The little email that could

Adventuring rule #9: Do not be afraid of perceived power.

      Professors are sassy. They have a kind of power, knowing they posses more degrees and years of education than you do, and some like to throw it around a little. So when you outsmart them, it feels so right.

     In searching for proper sources to complete my senior project articles, I was directed again and again to a certain English professor. Originally she didn't seem to have time for me. Her office hours conflicted with my class schedule and weeks went by without a response to my request for to make another appointment.
Because professors are like the dentist. You have to ask for a special time to experience the privilege of them scraping your teeth with little metal hooks. Or maybe that pain is in my head. I avoid office hours.

     The point? When I sent her a followup email, asking again to interview her, I got this:

Hi, SUPER POLITE STUDENT--
I responded to you quite awhile ago, when you first wrote to me, and at that time I invited you to come and talk with me.  Now, I'm afraid, I won't be back on campus until after Spring break, but you would be welcome to come and see me then.  My office hours are Mondays from *** to *** and Tuesdays from *** to ***...and by appointment.  O.K.?!
With all best--
SUPER SECRET IDENTITY



      Do you see the exclamatory question mark? The all-caps phrasing? What about the condescension? Because I sure do. But I save every single email, so I knew I was in the right. This set me up neatly to send this in response:

Hello!

I'm so sorry to have caused any frustration. I did reply to your first response, asking if we could set up an appointment. I never heard back, so I went around asking other English professors. They all pointed me back in your direction, so I thought it might be worth a follow up email. Can I make an appointment to meet with you on **** morning or ***** afternoon of the week when we return from break? Thank you!
Thank you!
SUPER POLITE STUDENT 

    
     She was defeated. I imagined her expression upon reading this, how it might change from shock at my galling tone to panic as she scanned her inbox, searching for my past messages. In under twenty minutes, I had a new email notification winking at me, attached to my first request for an interview.

Hi, SUPER POLITE STUDENT--
Was this the message that I didn't respond to?  I'm so sorry that it escaped my notice....I'm afraid I'm not on campus on Wednesdays until the afternoon, and I'm not on campus at all on Thursdays.  I could meet with you on a Monday afternoon or evening, a Tuesday afternoon, or a Wednesday afternoon or evening.  If none of those times work, perhaps we could set up a phone appointment?
With all best wishes meanwhile--
SUPER SECRET IDENTITY

     Hmm. Suddenly there's all these hours of availability. And best wishes, I see? Interesting. Oh, and the interview? It's set for next week. This was fun.

*names have been changed to protect the innocent